Let’s talk about the downright bizarre — the symptoms you won’t find in your average WebMD rabbit hole, yet that sometimes show up before you even realize you’re in perimenopause.

1. The Unexpected Heat: Hot Soles of the Feet

You know what’s surprisingly fun? Sleeping with ice packs at the foot of your bed because your feet are on fire! Not metaphorically — its as if you’ve been walking across a bed of coals. For some women, it’s just the soles of their feet. For others, it’s also the palms of their hands. Some of us get both. It’s one of those quirks of perimenopause that doesn’t show up in the brochure. And unlike your average hot flash, this one doesn’t just come and go. It lingers. All night. Especially in the summer. You’ll find yourself casually slipping off your shoes in the produce aisle just to feel the cool salvation of grocery store tile.

For me, the most effective relief — not just for hot feet, but for nearly all my perimenopause symptoms — came from bioidentical hormone therapy, which helped replenish what my ovaries had decided to stop producing. At the same time it’s a beautiful time to show your feet a little extra love. Start with a cold water soak, followed by a gentle foot massage while telling your feet how much you appreciate all they do for you. Then finish with a liberal spritzing of non-toxic, homemade cooling foot spray. Just mix 2 oz of 190-proof grain alcohol with 20 drops each of peppermint and lavender essential oils in a 4 oz spray bottle. Shake well, then top it off with water. Keep it in the fridge for bonus chill factor. And don’t underestimate the power of staying well hydrated — it plays a quiet but essential role in helping your body regulate temperature.

More Peri-menopause Symptoms Relief ➜

2. Don’t. Touch. Me.

Then there’s the exquisite irony of feeling more irritable than ever while simultaneously desiring the comfort of a warm hug. That hand on your shoulder that once felt soothing and grounding? Now feels like a combination of sandpaper and cactus. And those gentle back scratches from your partner that used to make you melt? Suddenly overwhelmingly intolerable. Some women report a strange hypersensitivity to touch, not in an emotional sense but on the skin itself. Even soft fabrics or light contact can feel irritating or overstimulating. It’s not you being high-maintenance. It’s your nervous system on estrogen withdrawal.

Besides replacing lost hormones, the key to dealing with this symptom lies in supporting your nervous system. Anything you can do to soothe and strengthen it will be rewarding in many ways. There are many available supplements and essential oils that can support it as well as gadgets and techniques. But meditation and exercise are some of the best, and in my opinion, especially walking in nature. Also, don't forget to communicate! Let your loved ones know what you’re experiencing—trust us, they’d rather understand than misinterpret your sudden aversion to affection!

3. The Mystery of the Shrinking Bladder

Remember when you could watch a whole movie without needing to pee? You may find that your bladder capacity feels like it has shrunk to thimble-sized, where one sip of tea equals three bathroom trips. Add in the hormone-fueled weakening of your pelvic floor and suddenly sneezing, laughing, and jumping are extreme sports!

This symptom will respond to some attention and pelvic floor training, even with hormone replacement. Engaging in pelvic floor exercises can help strengthen the muscles that support your bladder. There are some excellent programs available, such as my favorite, the Cooch Ball Program as well as electro-stim pelvic-training devices that can do wonders, not just for bladder function, but for sexual confidence as well.

4. Wait… Whose Voice Is That?

One day you’re mid-conversation and catch yourself thinking… when did my voice start sounding like this? Not sick, not hoarse — just… deeper. Richer. Like you’ve been quietly moonlighting as Kathleen Turner. It creeps in so gradually, you might chalk it up to aging, or, as I did, decades of breathing in Los Angeles smog. I honestly thought the city air had finally taken its toll, as if I had been smoking all those years. You might actually enjoy this symptom. That new voice can feel kind of powerful — sultry, commanding, the kind that makes people pause and listen. Worked for Kathleen.

But then, a couple years after I started bioidentical hormone therapy, it quietly disappeared. No fanfare. No high notes. I just sounded like myself again. It wasn’t until then that I realized: oh. That was hormonal too.

Riding the Waves with Care and Connection

Peri-menopause can often feel like an unexpected ride on a roller coaster you didn't mean to get on. Just when you think you’ve got the hang of managing your life, it throws you another curveball—or, in this case, a quirky symptom that feels like it belongs in a surreal comedy. But you are not alone, and you are not crazy. This is a good time to ramp of your self care — even if just a little bit — eating better, exercising, staying connected friends and family, meditating and getting out in nature regularly can all go a long way to managing this wild ride.

More Holistic Health & Menopause Solutions ➜

Thank you for supporting this space and my mission to share the most advanced, effective, and empowering wellness and financial solutions for women. Links on this page connect you to small, ethical, women-owned companies and when you use them, you help sustain this work through commissions.